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Wednesday, April 19, 2006

four

That's the number of gray hairs that I plucked out of my newly 26-year-old scalp this morning. One for each of the small children that are in my home today (two of my own, two borrowed).

According to the Old Wive's Tale, I will soon have 12 gray hairs. They say that for each gray hair you pluck out, three new ones will grow in it's place. Did I do that math right? 4 hairs times 3 is 12, right? Did I mention I have four small children in my house today? This lady that came up in my google search says that it's a myth and it only seems true because my "body has begun the graying process and in it’s natural course more and more hair roots begin to produce gray hair instead of the former youthful color." Oh that's even better news. Did I also mention that I'm only 26?

I'm too young to be gray. I'm still getting used to the new darker hair that two pregnancies lovingly bestowed on me. Nature made a big mistake with this one. Dark hair does not do anything for my skin tone. I had to go have it highlighted to look like me!

But there's good news! Some guy named Ray says that it's just because my diet has been "too yang" for a long time and I just need more "yin." Perfect! Oh wait. Ray also says that the stress of raising his teenage daughter caused him to go gray and no amount of yin could change that.

I'm dooooooomed!

Taylor Hicks would probably have many words of wisdom for me, but for now I'm just going to look on the bright side:

Bright Side #1--I'll have a good excuse to get my hair done often.

Bright Side #2--I'm already married. I don't have to try to find my soul mate while blinding him with my shiny silver locks.

Bright Side #3--People will think I'm the Grandmother and not give me disapproving looks when my kids throw fits in public. They'll just give me looks of sympathy thinking that it's their parent's fault and not mine.

Bright Side #4--People will stop telling me that I'm too young to have two kids.

Bright Side #5--Maybe I'll be offered a Senior Citizens discount.

Bright Side #6--When I'm 60, I can say "I have the same hair I had at 30!" and not be lying.

Gray is the new blonde. Just you wait and see.

19 comments:

Doulabean said...

You seriously crack me up!!!! I'm rolling on the ground. lol

Andrea said...

you know what? i found 4 grey hairs in the front of my hair just 2 days ago. I'm only 27!! I knew i had 1 but 4!!! beyond the joke.

Maine Mom said...

yeah, I'm a young, hip, greying mom myself. I yank them out, but they insist on coming back!
BTW-I tagged you when you weren't looking...check out my 2 for the price of 1 post. Have fun!

Rachelle said...

LOL! You are too funny. I haven't found any grey yet, but dh is covered with them. You will be a hot grey haired person!

Linsey said...

LOL!!! Always a bright side!

Thankfully I will never have (or atleast know about) a grey hair. I don't let my roots grow out far enough....

sheri said...

ditto rachelle and linsey. And I absolutely LOVE your dark hair. Gorgeous!

Stephanie said...

Can I join in the gnashing of teeth? My gray hairs are having babies!!! My mom told me to get a brown and a black sharpie to cover those pesky grays inbetween dye jobs. Don't knock it, it works!!!

Mama Darlin' said...

I just love it! Your post was the highlight of my very hard day! Thanks for helping me see the brighter side of things.

Lei said...

roflmbo! you are hilarious!!!

Lee said...

You are too freaking funny!! I think your hair looks fab!!!

ShelahBooksIt said...

my dh has been going gray since we met (he was 18)! So I have a special fondness for gray hair.
.

ubercyl said...

*snickering*

My gray hairs are mysteriously multiplying as well.

emlouisa said...

rofl!!! I found 1 gray hair on my 25th birthday. I cried.

Stacy said...

GREAT post! You had me laughing and crying right along with you!

Jane said...

Sorry Alicia--
I guess there is a good thing about being blonde, I can hide the gray for now. I am just waiting for the day when I have all white hair.

momofalltrades said...

Great tip Stephanie! I've got the grey thing going on too. But I'm telling you, as soon as I go grey all over, I'm totally dying my hair old-lady-lilac. Totally. LOL

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