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Wednesday, May 24, 2006

happy leaf day from the pack-rat

Our Little Boy has a problem. We are seeking to remedy it, but currently we are unsure that there is a cure or any treatment. It may be something we have to suffer until he moves out of our home.

It seems our sweet Little Boy has inherited the Pack-Rat Gene. And it's invading our home.

The Assistant Gardener and I are the anti-pack-rat. Throwing away is therapeutic, organizing is bliss, and an uncluttered minimalist home is beautiful.

Little Boy didn't inherit that gene. Instead he's taking after past generations (and a few cousins) and has become real life genuine pack-rat.

It all started with my tupperware and other plastic containers disappearing from my kitchen. Then I noticed Little Boy's hot wheel cars disappearing. I discovered he was filling tupperware with cars and stashing them on the top shelf in his closet. I took a deep breath and refrained from emptying the containers and putting them back everything back where it belongs. I also took a deep breath and vowed to stop looking on the top shelf in his closet.




That was just the tip of the iceberg. Soon, water bottles full of sticks, flowers, rocks, and leaves made their way to the top shelf. Books disappeared from our office bookshelf and were found in the closet. Coins, junk mail, strips of paper, rocks, pinecones, sticks were soon found on the top shelf in Little Boy's closet. When toys started disappearing from Fat Girl's room, guess where we found them?


A couple weeks ago, I left $60 on Steve's dresser and when I went to claim it a few days later, it was gone. Steve confessed to taking $20 of it for lunch, but said the rest was still there. It wasn't. We searched high and low until Steve suggested we look in Little Boy's closet. We did. And we found it. Not only is Little Boy a pack-rat, but he's apparently also a little Klepto.

The collections have spilled out onto Little Boy's dresser now. He borrowed Fat Girl's purse to hold all of his pinecones (maybe he did inherit a little bit of the organizing gene), and rocks and sticks have become a permanent fixture there.

As hard as it is for me---the borderline OCD mom who must have control---I have allowed this mess to continue. It's his room, afterall. But, when the pack-ratting migrates to my kitchen counter, things must change. This mom can't just take a deep breath to get through that.

As cute as I find it that after Little Boy has gathered ziploc bags full of leaves he declares it "Leaf Day," tells everyone "Happy Leaf Day!," and even makes Leaf Day cards, I still cannot relinquish control. I'm just not that cool of a mom.

We continue to hope and pray that Little Boy will outgrow this and be the organized-non-pack-ratting individual we know he has the potential to be.

Until then, we'll put on a happy face and wish you a Happy Leaf Day!

Monday, May 22, 2006

the famous bloggirls

Oh what a night! The Famous Bloggirls spent the weekend on tour and I got a front row seat! It was awesomely fantabulous in every way. We laughed, we played, we giggled, and oh did we party! And not one Bloggirl turned out to be a dirty old man...what are the odds?

There are or will be about eleven or so other blogs on this topic outlining all of the various Bloggirl adventures, so I'll keep it short and just share some photos of the event. Some are great and some are seriously unflattering (but funny, or I wouldn't be so rude as to plaster them on the internet!), but all are entertaining.

Emily (remember that Ode? That's Emily. Isnt she stunning?) and I.
Taffi & Mary
Karen. She's a thief.
Big Pile 'O Money
She's Young. She's Daring. She's Kathryn!
Karli and her luscious lips First impressions are everything...sorry Karen.
There's no feet like Bloggirl Feet.
The Famous Bloggirls & Company
Bottom Row: Kathryn, Karen, Mary, Erin, Stephanie, Elizabeth, Brooke

So there you have it! Best Friends Forever and all that--I have the necklace to prove it!

Oh...and Heather...I totally know you.

bloggirls continued...

How many pics does it take to get a perfect picture of four giggling bloggirls?



Sorry, Kathryn....I seriously could not resist...
Emily, Me, Kathryn, and Brooke.

Thursday, May 18, 2006

an ode to emily

Emily, Emily with her hair so brown
She's so much fun to have around

She's smart, and witty, and oh so funny
She makes my day so very sunny

It's with Emily I love to share my food
When we can't decide
If we are in an appetizer
Or dessert kind of mood

Emily, Emily with her rubbing feet
She can't help it and I think it's kind of neat

It's Emily who tells great stories when she gets the chance
And makes me laugh so hard I pee my pants

She's a wife, a mom, former turkey grower, and friend
I hope my fun with her will never ever end!


Bloggers---your mission of you choose to accept it is to write an Ode to one of your favorite friends. Do two if you can't decide! Make someone feel loved today!

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

a lesson for today

No matter how sweet she may appear...

If your little girl asks for an apple and you cut a pear instead thinking she won't notice or if she does notice she won't care....

Rest assured, she will notice and she will care. She will suddenly morph into a terrible toddler, throw the pear down in protest and scream "APPLE!"

Lesson Learned.

Monday, May 15, 2006

my favorite story revisited

Today's Topic: The Story of My Spouse, How We Met and Got Together. I blogged this topic back in February on our anniversary, so go read all about it, and then come back here for more My Life Monday excitment.
You know what was missing in that story? Pictures! Well, there were two, but here are some more. The first two pictures are from our trip to Las Vegas. Never mind my hoochie shorts and fat thighs. I've got better fashion sense (and thinner thighs) now.

These pictures were taken at the Oakland Temple when my sister-in-law got married and just weeks after we met. We knew at this point that we would be getting married too, but nobody else knew.


This next picture is of our beloved old car. When I first met Steve, he drove a dark blue New Beetle, but shortly after (just a week, I think!) we traded it in and bought this Reflex Yellow New Beetle. It is a Limited Edition color and only 2000 were made. We loved this vehicle. Some of my fondest memories were driving around in this car with the windows down, hair blowing, and singing along to the radio. We traded it in for a family car just before Little Boy was born. We still miss this car! Last year, we were visiting the city where we traded it in and found it on a used car lot--we knew it was ours because of the custom wheels that Steve loved so much. If we had the money, we would have bought it again!

I hope you enjoyed the short picture tour of the first month of our courtship. It was a whirlwind of excitment! Steve has much shorter hair and I have much less weight, but we have much more love than ever before!

Thursday, May 11, 2006

you are my son-shine

Today I was invited to Little Boy's preschool for a Mother's Tea. It was magical, memorable, brought me to tears more than once, and made me so proud to be a Mother.

Little Boy has been very excited about today and has talked about the presents he made for me at school. We took Fat Girl to daddy's office to hang out for a little while so Little Boy could have me all to himself. (Daddy and Fat Girl had quite the adventure. He took her walking around the pond, to the playground, and for a walk by the river. She was worn out when I came back to get her. I'm thinking about taking her to hang out with daddy before naptime every day.) What was I talking about? Oh yes, the Mother's Tea.

Upon arrival, the kids went into their classroom and the moms were hussled into an empty classroom to wait for a few minutes while they prepared. The moms from Little Boy's class have never been especially friendly or talkative, so it was a bit awkward for me. It was icy until redhead mom showed up and declared that her kids were filthy and she was not a bad mother because of it. She explained that they went outside and dumped ashes into each other's hair just before it was time to come. I laughed, the other moms looked at each other and chuckled nervously and unconvincingly. Maybe redhead mom and I should hang out---we both seem to be the outcast moms of this group!

We were called out in the hallway and lined up in the same order as the children and each mother came in the room one at a time. I came in third and saw Little Boy all dressed up in a man's green dress shirt and a tie---he looked so cute! All the boys were dressed like that and all the girls had on adorable little aprons. Little Boy came forward and put a bead and pasta necklace around my neck, and asked me if I would read him a story (teary time #1). We went over to the floor and read a couple of short books together.
After every mom received her beautiful jewelry and stories were read all around, the kids led us to our seats where a sweet picture of our kids were the place card. Inside it was a poem about handprint (teary time #2) and had our kid's handprint in it. The kids went to the front and serenaded us with a few songs---You are My Sunshine (teary time again), I Love You, and Happy Mother's Day To You.
After the concert concluded, each child showed the placemat he or she had made for his or her mother. The placemats say, "I love my mom because..." Little Boy said "I love my mom because she makes me two cookies." Apparently, I should start making cookies if that's why he loves me.
After the placemats were all handed out, the kids went and got trays and bowls of food (rolls, chicken salad, muffins, fruit salad, fruit dip, veggie tray, veggie dip, & lemonade) and served us all. The were so excited. One little girl told me I should really try the chocolate muffins. I did and she was right---yummy. The kids then sat down with us and we had a nice little brunch.
This was the most fun I've had in a long time! (Since the last Girls Night with Emily and Jami at the very least!) I was the only mom who seemed more than mildly amused, the only mom who got teary, and the only mom who brought a camera. But, the jokes on them because I'm also the only mom who now has a 30-second video of her son singing "You Are My Sunshine" with a big sun around his face. How happy am I!

two for togetherness tag

I've been tagged by Stephanie!

Two for Togetherness Tag

2 things you compliment your husband on while in his presence.
1. His willingness and ability to help
2. His ambitious nature

2 compliments you make about your spouse to your friends about your spouse.
1. He helps do everything around the house. He never leaves it all to me.
2. He works hard.

2 traits you married him/her for.
1. His intelligence and ambition
2. His patience with me!

2 Days you cherished the most with your husband being together.
1. The day we went to Las Vegas together.
2. The day our kids were born.

2 Material things you could give your husband if you just inherited a fortune.
1. A fully restored 1949 split window Volkswagen beetle in black.
2. A fully restored victorian home from the 1800's.

2 things you would miss the most if she/he left for two weeks.
1. The Help!!
2. The company and conversation.

2 thoughts that crossed your mind when you first met/saw your spouse.
1. He's cute.
2. He's the one!

2 favorite dates
1. Driving in the Utah Mountains with our windows down in our old new beetle.
2. Going to the Temple.

2 funny odd things you love.
1. His little OCD habits...turning clothes the same way, using the same color hangers, etc.
2. He's really not that odd....just perfect the way he is!

2 two places you have lived with your spouse.
1. Springville, Utah
2. Livermore, Calfornia

2 favorite Vacations
1. Lake Tahoe
2. Orlando

Katy, Emily, Lee, Taffi, & Sunny....You've been tagged! I want to hear your Two For Togetherness answers!

Monday, May 08, 2006

my life monday

I didn't know it...but it's also:
Rachelle issued this assignment (she is a teacher...she issues assignments) and from now on I'm going to participate and change my "What Do You Love" days to another day of the week. I don't know when yet...it will be a surprise.

Today's Topic: My Most Memorable Childhood Experience. I've been thinking about this topic all morning. I even looked through my photo albums hoping something would jump out at me, but nothing really did. I have a lot of little tidbits of memories and such, but no real memorable childhood experiences and nothing with a lot of detail. This isn't really an experience so much as an insight as to how I was as a kid---but it'll have to do!

I was a weird kid that tried desperately to be normal. One of my teachers even gave me the award for "Best Attempt at Normalcy during Adolescence" in Middle School. I know all kids are weird to an extent, but I think I was really weird. I also loved (LOVED) to read. I read so much that my mom would try to get me to stop in the same way that most parents try to bribe their kids to read more. I made a goal in Elementary School to read all of the books in the school library (I didn't make it). I read for hours on end---in my room, in the bathroom, at the dinner table... I tell you all this to prep you for the following experience:

I don't know when I started or when I stopped doing this, but I liked to pretend that I was the main character in the book I was reading. I read a lot of The Babysitter's Club series and tried to start my own Club. I also tried to be a babysitter like them. I failed in both attempts---nobody can be as cool as them!

I found the book Death From Child Abuse and No One Heard at a neighbor's garage sale and read that book at least a dozen times. I don't know why I was so fascinated by it, but I would pretend I was the little girl while I was reading it. The step-father in the book wouldn't allow the little girl to use the bathroom and punished her when she would have an accident. So, while reading it, I would hold my pee until the very last possible second. (See, weird.)

The Secret Garden was one of my all-time favorites and while reading that one, I would pretend to be Mary Lennox---especially as she discovered the great outdoors. I would wolf down my meals like she did in the book and then run outside hoping to experience what she had.

I'm sure there is some underlying issue that I must have had, but luckily I outgrew it and I've stopped trying to be someone else. Unfortunately, I also stopped reading like I did. That's one thing I wouldn't mind picking up again.

what do you love today?

It's What Do You Love Monday!

Alissa's blog about her day at the beach and the pictures of her kids reminded me of a picture that I love. So, here is the #1 thing I love today...this photo:
I love everything about this photograph. I love the beach where it was taken (the beach where Steve proposed) and I love his footprints in the sand. I love the way the sun is reflecting off the sand and I love the perfect shadow. I love the way Little Boy's jeans are rolled up to his knees and most of all I love the way it captures some of his sense of wonder and curiosity.

More things I love today:

I love...
... that I have Good Friends.
...Sunny Mornings .
...Honey Graham Ohs cereal.
...Wonder Pets.
...that I'm not a Turkey Grower.
...a day with nothing on the calendar.

Happy Monday!

Friday, May 05, 2006

family portraits

We have company right now---three 20 year old college students. Two of them are my neices and they brought along a friend. Since I'm busy trying to appear cooler than my old-married-mommy self, today's blog is brought to you by Little Boy.

Little Boy is an artist. Maybe he's just mediocre and draws like every other almost-four-year-old in the world, but we think he's brilliant and very talented. We are his parents and we are allowed to think that. Little Boy drew all of our portraits. It's very impressive.

This is Me. Little Boy hasn't made it very clear what I'm holding in my hand, but I think it's a chocolate bar. That would explain the big smile on my face:

This is Daddy. In reality, Daddy doesn't look so, um, interesting. I think Little Boy may have been experimenting with some new techniques:
This is Little Boy's self portrait. I worry about body image. Does he really think he has huge ears? This is the Little Sister, Fat Girl. She's the lucky one, because she's holding a rocket, says Little Boy. Of course, she is bald, so maybe she's not so lucky.
My favorite part is that we are all smiling!

Monday, May 01, 2006

making choices

To Choose or not to choose-that is the question:
Whether tis easier for the mind to suffer

The uncertainty and confusion of sitting idle,
Or to muster courage and heart in a decision
And, by deciding, simplify. To sit, to question-
No more-and by a question to say we end
The heartache and the thousand uncertain thoughts
That vacillation is heir to-'tis a situation
Inevitably encountered. To sit, to question-
To question, perchance to discern. Ay, there's discord,
For in that tentative contemplation what options may arise,
When we have pondered every answer,
Must give us turmoil. There's the doubt
That makes procrastination and idleness so long.
For who would accept the anquish and disorder of wait,
Th' chaotic election, the proud man's contumely,
The twists of bewilderment, the mind's mishap,
The indecisiveness of heart, and the resignation
That exhausted minds and restless hearts take,
When he himself might a justification make
and suffer a futile result? Who would agony bear,
To flounder and worry over a settlement,
But that the dread of something unseen in life,
The undiscovered detail which whose result
Destroys the traveler, puzzles the logic
And makes us rather bear those ills we had
Than live with subsequent selections we know not of
Thus uncertainty does make indecisive of us all,
And thus the original peace of comfort
Is uprooted with the uproar of change,
And the unseen of great and powerful
With this their unsettled hearts shy away
And those the moment of happiness. -Elect one now
The hesitant thinker-Friend, in they knowledge
Be clear in thy presentation.


I wrote that several years ago. It's form was obviously stolen from Shakespeare's "To Be or Not To Be," but it's one of my favorite peices that I've written and I think about it often.

I'm bad at making big decisions. I can easily make a decision about what to buy at the store (maybe too easily, I tend to impulse shop.) But ask me to decide about things that impact life as I know it and I'm stumped. I like to be able to predict what will happen next---I'm a planner. Even if it's only in my head, I have a plan about how things are going to happen (and I get frustrated and agitated when things don't go with that plan...just ask Steve). Since I can't predict the future, making big decisions put me in a state of utter turmoil and fear. I tend to ignore the decision to be made or defer the decision making to someone else. I often wonder what it would be like if life was like Jeopardy where we got the answers first and then had to figure out the question. That seems like it would be easier.

If we need to decide where to have Play Group next week, where to have dinner, or what movie to watch, I'm your gal. But please, someone else decide for me where we should live, when we should have another baby, and what medications I should take. I can't the stress.

Thus uncertaintly does make indecisive of us all. Well, Me at least.

Friday, April 28, 2006

there's more to see

The photo shoot wouldn't have been complete without some contribution from Fat Girl (she's thinning out-we may have to consider a name change. Maybe "The princess formerly known as Fat Girl"). She's more of a "catch-me-if-you-can" kind of girl than a huge ham like Little Boy. She does smile-you just have to work for it and it has to be on her own terms. She's got a mood all her own:


Pretty as a flower, but cuter in a flower.

Thursday, April 27, 2006

a conversation with little boy

Having a conversation with Little Boy can be exhausting. He talks and talks and talks...you get the idea. He talks about his favorite things (monster trucks), his favorite people (Grandpa), what he'd like to do (drive a monster truck with Grandpa), what he'd like for his birthday (everything). The list goes on and on. Having a conversation with Little Boy can also be enriching and fulfilling. If you can get him to settle for a moment and talk to you, you get some insight into how special this Little Boy is. He's got a sparkle in his eye that is unmatched, a laugh in his voice that makes me smile, and an energy that I could only wish to have. This Little Boy has great things ahead for him.

Yesterday, we had an impromptu photo session in the backyard. I sat Little Boy down and we talked. Well he talked and I snapped pictures:




How's that for a beautiful conversation?

Monday, April 24, 2006

wierd things

There's some wierdness going around the Blog World. People are sharing all sorts of wierd things about themselves. It's catching, apparently, because I have been infected by Maine Mom. Lest people think I'm no fun, or worse, NORMAL, I'll share some of my wierdness with you.

--I tie my hair in knots. I twirl my hair with my fingers and I can tie knots in my hair with one hand. I've been doing it for years and I have a sister that does the same. It's hereditary and I just can't help it. It's not as bad as it used to be. Now my hands are usually busy and don't have time for hair twisting and twirling much less knot tying. But, my bad habit comes out when I'm watching tv or a movie and it drives Steve crazy. Not as much as his constant tapping and drumming drives me crazy, though.

--I can't stand leaving multiple windows open on my computer desktop. I like a clean desktop. Nevermind that the actual top of my desk is messy and looks similar to Emily's. I close a window as soon as I'm finished with it and I'd rather have to come back to something than to open a new window to use temporarily. It makes me crazy. What also makes me crazy is Steve when he has 8+ windows open on his desktop and he's finished with all but one. Why leave them open? If you ask me, this is more his wierd thing than mine. But he says I'm the wierd one.

--I clean out my nose with Q-Tips. There, I said it. The world now knows. Blowing my nose just doesn't get it clean enough. There are still bits of yuckiness in there and they must come out. Q-Tips are great for this. It's an obsession really, but at least I have a clean nose.

--I like to rock myself to sleep. I lay on my side and rock back and forth. I don't know when this started, but it's soothing and I can fall alseep faster. Unfortunantly, when I do this the entire bed rocks too and Steve isn't into rocking to sleep. I've refrained, but someday we're going to buy one of those "bowling ball mattresses" and I will be able to rock all I want.

--I'm obsessed with correct use and installation of carseats. Wierd, yes, but not bad! I'm just very passionate about my kids (and other people's kids!) being as safe as possible when riding in motor vehicles. I spend a lot of time researching and learning about carseats and how to install them properly. I'm going to be a Child Passenger Safety Expert someday. My 18-month-old is still rear facing and my almost 4 year old is still in a 5-point-harness. My kids aren't any better than yours. Just safer.

--I eat really fast. Steve says I don't chew. I do, just really quickly. I don't know why I practically inhale my food. I just do. I can eat my entire meal while feeding Fat Girl, clear the table, and have half the kitchen cleaned before Steve finishes eating. But, then again, he eats really slow. Our kids seem to eat at normal speed. Maybe they are the happy medium we've been looking for.

It's two for one day here at the Garden because it's What Do You Love Monday and I need to share my things I love. In sticking with the theme, I'll share some of the wierd things I love.

-French Fries dipped in Wendy's Frosty
-Disney Channel shows
-The smell of Alberson's brand glass cleaner
-Organizing
-Crayola Crayon smell

What Wierd Things Do You Love?

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

four

That's the number of gray hairs that I plucked out of my newly 26-year-old scalp this morning. One for each of the small children that are in my home today (two of my own, two borrowed).

According to the Old Wive's Tale, I will soon have 12 gray hairs. They say that for each gray hair you pluck out, three new ones will grow in it's place. Did I do that math right? 4 hairs times 3 is 12, right? Did I mention I have four small children in my house today? This lady that came up in my google search says that it's a myth and it only seems true because my "body has begun the graying process and in it’s natural course more and more hair roots begin to produce gray hair instead of the former youthful color." Oh that's even better news. Did I also mention that I'm only 26?

I'm too young to be gray. I'm still getting used to the new darker hair that two pregnancies lovingly bestowed on me. Nature made a big mistake with this one. Dark hair does not do anything for my skin tone. I had to go have it highlighted to look like me!

But there's good news! Some guy named Ray says that it's just because my diet has been "too yang" for a long time and I just need more "yin." Perfect! Oh wait. Ray also says that the stress of raising his teenage daughter caused him to go gray and no amount of yin could change that.

I'm dooooooomed!

Taylor Hicks would probably have many words of wisdom for me, but for now I'm just going to look on the bright side:

Bright Side #1--I'll have a good excuse to get my hair done often.

Bright Side #2--I'm already married. I don't have to try to find my soul mate while blinding him with my shiny silver locks.

Bright Side #3--People will think I'm the Grandmother and not give me disapproving looks when my kids throw fits in public. They'll just give me looks of sympathy thinking that it's their parent's fault and not mine.

Bright Side #4--People will stop telling me that I'm too young to have two kids.

Bright Side #5--Maybe I'll be offered a Senior Citizens discount.

Bright Side #6--When I'm 60, I can say "I have the same hair I had at 30!" and not be lying.

Gray is the new blonde. Just you wait and see.

Monday, April 17, 2006

what do you love? (part two)

What Do You Love? I stole this title from one of my favorite children's books. It is about the sweetest little puppy boy and all the things he loves. Little things like park slides and piggyback rides, ice-cream bars and shooting stars, mud pies and mommy's eyes, jumping puddles and mommy's cuddles. I love the sweetness and the innocence of the things he loves. It's the simple things in life that I love the most. So, from here on out, It's "What Do you Love Mondays" here at my blog. Mondays are usually blah for me and I need a few moments to think of all the things that are good and wonderful about life. Here's what I love today:

Spring Flowers
Summer Days at the Park
Late Summer Nights
4th of July Parades
Sandy Beaches
Crisp Apples
Barbeques
Swimming Pools
Sweet Baby Smells

What do you love today?

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

what do you love? (part one)

Wow. Thank you all so much for the outpouring of love, support, and concern---both in comments here, in email, and in phone calls. I'm so thankful for friends and readers like you all! Today is a better day. The sun is shining and so is my soul.

This is part one of a two part segment. Today's segment is a photo tour of my backyard displaying all of my favorite spring things. There is definitely beauty all around.

(click on any photo to see it larger)









Friday, April 07, 2006

i'm tired

Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance. We've all heard about the five stages of grief, right? It sounds so simple. Get through the first four stages and voila, you've made it! I've learned that it's not quite that simple.

I was diagnosed with Lupus (and maybe Rheumatoid Arthritis) in December 2004. I definitely had the denial thing down pat. It didn't seem real and it wasn't real. I was only 24! I was definitely too young to be hobbling around with my knees aching and my hands hurting too much to diaper my 2 month old baby. "This is just some wierd fluke thing and it's going to go away," I thought. It didn't go away. In fact, it got worse. The medications my doctor tried didn't work and that's when the anger set in.

I was ticked. I wanted to yell, kick, scream, swear, and blame someone. Mostly I blamed myself. If I had not done _____, then this wouldn't have happened to me. If I had just _____, this wouldn't have happened to me. That's when I started bargaining.

If I had done something to make this happen, surely I could bargain with God to get me out of it. I did everything I knew how to do and made every bargain with God I knew how to make. But nothing changed. I was still in pain, still tired all of the time, and I had still had Lupus. I was broken. Guess what came next? Ya, I was depressed.

How could I not be depressed? I hurt all the time, I was tired all of the time, I had done something to make this happen to myself, and God had forsaken me. Depression affects everyone differently, but for me, depression makes me want to sleep all of the time, stay home and wallow in self-pity, and I'm short tempered. After awhile there, I started to come out of the hole and realize (with the help of some great friends) that I would get through this, it wasn't my fault, and that I would be okay.

Ahhhh, Acceptance. It would be smooth sailing from here on out, right? RIGHT?

Oh no! It doesn't work that way. It's all too easy to sink back in and go through all of these stages over and over again! I go through phases of denial fairly often, anger even more often, depression most often, and throw a bit of bargaining in for good measure. Every time a medication fails, I get depressed. Every time I fill my med box with my daily dose of 12+ pills, I get angry.

Today? Today I'm just tired. I'm taking yet another medication and it hasn't worked yet and it makes me nauseated. I'm tired of hurting. I'm tired of being tired. I'm tired of being broken.

I try not to complain. I try to be strong. I try to keep it together. I think I'm failing.

Monday, April 03, 2006

poor mouse

After a weekend of General Conference and rain, the daddy said "I'm tired of being cooped up in the house."

The Little Boy overheard and asked, "Why'd you poop on the mouse?"

Apparently, the earwax buildup is worse than we thought.